Changing Times

It was my lunch hour some weeks ago. The tiny restaurant was filled with hungry customers so I was relieved and surprised when I spotted an empty table near the entrance. I plopped my purse on the seat next to me and was just about to take a bite of a sizzling hot French fry when I saw my cellphone light up. 

It was my mom. 

“I just want to say that you are such a good daughter. You’re always giving, you always show love, you care about others. You never gave me any trouble. I’m sure you’re a good friend too.”

It was an unexpected boost. I smiled as I soaked up her praise. But then, her voice tinged with concern, she said,

“I just don’t want you to be alone.”

I spent the latter part of the call reassuring her that my solo life will turn into a duet soon. But a part of me saddened when she said that. 

Whether she will admit to it or not, my mother has a very simple equation for a good life:


I think a lot of women in her generation know that type of math by heart. 

My mother was born in the 1950s, an era where the minute there was a Mr. to your Mrs., you were set for life. 

In that time, a single woman in her late-twenties was as rare a sight as a unicorn galloping in Times Square. 

Which is why it’s an enigma to her why a woman like me is still untaken.

Times have changed. 

For the large part, the need for marriage is gone but the want still remains.

So out of those that want it, there’s a section of us who want to do it with God’s help. 

Out of that population, there are some that have a not-so-minor prerequisite.

Out of that portion, there are some that have an additional requirement.

Such ratios don’t make dating and finding a mate impossible.

But they do make it difficult. 

Not good news for eager and concerned mothers.

During another similar conversation, my mother mused, 

“I’ll sure be glad when you bring home a beau.” 

I laughed silently at her use of the dated term and thought, 

I’ll be glad too, Mom. 

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